In the Preface to our book, Conflict Resolution: The Partnership Way (2009), we challenge the prevailing assumption that ‘war is inevitable’ and declare that, “the natural state of the universe is peaceful interdependence.” This is also one of the founding principles of our non-profit organization, The Carolina Institute for Conflict Resolution and Creative Leadership. We proclaim that if we are able to understand true source of any conflict, then we are able to design effective strategies to resolve that conflict at its source.
Assuming That War Is Inevitable
The problem has been that those foreign and military experts
who work on identifying the source of these conflicts have led us into wars in
Iraq and Afganistan. They simply
are unable to see the true source of these conflicts and therefore the
strategies they propose do not resolve them. This then leads them to conclude
that “war is inevitable” and given that assumption the best they can do is
design strategies that they hope will contain these conflicts and give up
trying to ever resolve them. I
sometimes call this behavior, “premature hardening of the categories.”
This strategy has characterized the foreign policy of the U. S. government for at least the past 200 years, but most notably since 9/11/2001. The seemingly unprovoked attack on innocent civilians on our soil triggered an escalated national fear reaction that has led to 1000 of times the amount of destruction in the lives of others than was done to us on that day.
Billions are now being spent each day fighting “the war on terror,” almost without any thought of winning this war or restoring peace to the world. Since the underlying assumption is that “war is inevitable,” the goals become trying to contain the conflicts perpetrated by this “evil force” and hopefully helping to restore the false sense of safety the American people had prior to 9/11. This makes it virtually impossible to design a credible exit strategy from any occupation in a war-zone, because there is no possible exit from a war when you assume that it is inevitable.
Very little serious thought is currently being given at the highest levels to the true causes of the attack on 9/11. The collective projection that has evolved into a belief is that we were attacked for no reason by “crazy, evil, and radical Islamic fundamentalists.” So the only conclusion is to send more troops to fight those who started this war on terror wherever they are and sometimes where we think they are. This also feeds the projection by many of the residents of Afganistan that all Americans are evil, Christian, imperialists.
Our projections actually save us from having to look at the true causes of the conflict and what we might have done to contribute to these people being so “pissed off” at us. For starters, hardly anyone in this country wants to admit that our current unsustainable lifestyle practiced by 4% of the world’s population that uses up 25% of the world’s resources, might piss off some people, particularly those currently living in poverty. However, I actually believe that the true source of their discontent and their conflict with us goes much deeper than this.
Assuming That Peace Is Inevitable
If you start with the assumption that peace is inevitable
and that the natural state of the universe is peaceful interdependence, then
you have to look for the true sources of these conflicts that have created
aberrations of nature. In order to be able to search for the true sources of a
conflict we need a framework or theory to guide our search. We need a set of
testable assumptions that can lead us in a different direction, that leads us toward the
restoration of the natural state of interdependence.
In our book, Healing Developmental Trauma (2010), we create such a theory called, Developmental Systems Theory, based on 20 years of research we have done in various human systems. This theory provides the clues to help us search for the true cause of all conflicts, particularly intractable conflicts that get repeated over and over without any resolution. Conflicts that are intractable and won’t go away literally beg for a deeper, more complete search for their true causes. Basically, our consciousness had to shift in order to look at these conflicts in a deeper, more complete way. Armed with our theory we began to look deeply into the early developmental histories of individuals, couples, families, schools, churches, governments at all levels and non-profits and the entire human race to find the true causes of our conflicts.
What we found is that all human systems follow two evolutionary developmental tracks. According to the theory, all human systems evolve through four developmental stages: codependent, counterdependent, independent and interdependent. The track through these four stages that leads to peaceful interdependence we call the LOVEvolution Track. The long-term effects of unrecognized and unhealed early childhood relational shocks, traumas and stresses cause conflicts to emerge that lead into following the other track, the one we call the Developmental Trauma Track.
The core of our theory describes the essential developmental processes that each level of a human system has to complete successfully at each stage in order to stay on the LOVEvolution Track of evolution. It also describes the developmental shocks, traumas and stressors that interrupt the completion of these developmental processes and cause people to move into the Developmental Trauma Track. The theory then states that unless people identify and heal the long-term effects of these unrecognized and unhealed developmental shocks, traumas and stresses, that are the true sources of their conflicts, they will remain stuck in their evolution.
The hidden, long-term effects of these early childhood events, many being perceived as having been done to us for our own good, cause us to get triggered into reenacting them in our contacts with events and people. These events and people, in some usually unknown way, cause us to react as if we were back re-experiencing the feelings of the original event that we have tried to forget. These early experiences, if they are unrecognized and unhealed by the time we reach adulthood, also help create mistaken beliefs about who we are, who others are and how the world works that direct our behavior. Finally, the hidden effects of these early experiences sets up what we call “fractal patterns of behavior” that we act out of everywhere we go. The collective effect of these fractal patterns of behavior and mistaken beliefs is that we use them to unconsciously recreate the structures and processes of all our human systems: our primary relationships, our families, our schools, our religious institutions, communities, governments, etc.
Our research has led us to conclude that the natural learning style of humans is to draw to them any experiences that left a wound in their mindbody, until the underlying wounds are healed and the conflicts are resolved. Actually there is no way to avoid them from showing up in your life. We believe there is a natural drive for wholeness and LOVEvolution that compels us to resolve these lingering, often intractable conflicts, and heal the true causes of the conflicts that keep us stuck in self-defeating, dysfunctional behaviors and beliefs.
How Humans Evolve
Below is a chart that shows the essential developmental
processes for each stage of each level of human systems, drawn from our 20 year
of research. We believe these have to be completed at each stage of development
for that system to evolve. This theory actually provides a framework for the
development of peace initiatives that address the true causes all conflicts
that the initiative can then be designed to resolve.
Please click here to Download The Developmental Evolution of Human Microsystems chart. There is a lot of information contained in this chart and in order to more fully understand it you will need to purchase the book, Healing Developmental Trauma, where you will find a complete description of the Developmental Systems Theory and the two evolutionary tracks.
For the purposes of this post, look at the essential developmental processes we have listed for the individual. The extent to which these are completed forms the fractal patterns of behavior that we use to create all other human relationships and systems. Then, for purpose of this post, look at the essential developmental processes for a culture or nation-state. If national policy-makers were interested in moving people toward the LOVEvolution track, then these essential developmental processes would be a place to begin forming our national or international policy.
Beyond the Belief That War Is Inevitable
First, they would begin to realize that what we have been
doing in the world in the name of “peace or democracy” is based on collective
fractal patterns of behavior and thinking that stems from the collective
long-term effects of our own unrecognized and unhealed developmental shocks,
traumas and stresses. They would then begin to design domestic policies to help
the general public become better informed of how these long-term hidden effects
of our early childhood events have distorted our collective values, thinking,
behaviors and beliefs. They would then design policies and programs to help
people heal their wounds caused by these early childhood experiences.
Coming from this point of view, an affective domestic policy would be to insure these essential developmental processes are completed in early childhood. This might involve at least one year of universal family leave so that mothers and fathers could devote more quality time and attention to parenting their infant. Actually, the U. S. and South Africa are the only developed countries that do not already provide such benefits.
They would also need to establish an expanded parent education and support network to help parents be effective in the most difficult and important job on the planet. They would provide access to free, universal, home visitation services that would give parents needed information and support, particularly to new parents. This has been found to be the most effective method of preventing child abuse and neglect and would save enormous money and resources in trying to repair the damage later that was done by unskilled and overwhelmed parents.
Other effective policies might support the creation of a living wage for all workers to provide an economic floor for most families so that they could provide for themselves and their families. These are just a few examples of the many effective family and economic policies designed to help individuals and families complete their essential developmental processes. This would provide them with a foundation for becoming responsible citizens in a democracy.
At an international level, we could design effective global policies similar to those proposed by Rabbi Michael Lerner, in the form of a Global Marshall Plan that would involve all the developed nations contributing 1 percent to 1 and1/2 percent of their GDP. This money would be used to help the majority of the world lift out of poverty, disease, low levels of education, poor energy use, pollution, and poor food and water use.
Developing a foreign policy based on generosity instead of threats of military intervention would be a great place to start to help the world heal some of the wounds that we have helped to create by our greedy, aggressive and economically imperialistic foreign policies of the past.
This may take a while to accomplish because there is a lot
to be done and we took a while to get to this tipping point, but with
international cooperation that the GMP calls for, we could begin to move the
world much closer to the natural state of peaceful interdependence.
What if this theory were applied to the so-called war on terror? Those in charge of designing the foreign policy for the U. S. would have to utilize the essential developmental processes as a basis for designing effective policy strategies. This would mean then they would have to look at the war on terror in an entirely different way and recognize that our current policies are creating more conflicts than they are resolving them.
Intractable conflicts like exist in the Middle East could also be approached using this theory. Instead of fighting over who owns what small parcel of land, the focus could be on discovering the true social, economic and cultural causes of the intractable conflicts and then addressing them with effective policies that include the support of the whole international community.
The true causes of the intractable conflicts do not seem to ever get discussed and therefore all peace talks seem to be stuck on looking at the “window-dressing.” Such a proposal, titled, “An American Peace Initiative” by Gershon Baskin appears in the latest Tikkun magazine.
Now Hiring: Developmental Process Consultants
There is an obvious “catch twenty-two” in this proposed
solution that prevents these kinds of strategies from making it to desks of top
policy makers. The challenge is to find policy makers and leaders who can get
beyond the long-term effects of their own unrecognized and unhealed
developmental shocks, traumas, and stresses. We call such people who also are
trained to look at human systems in a developmental way, Developmental Process
Consultants. Our book on Healing Developmental Trauma describes the role of
these consultants.
The conventional policy-makers in these large systems, whose careers are at stake, usually do not dare look at the effects of their own developmental shock, trauma, and stress on their ideas, values or beliefs. In addition, they are likely to prevent anybody with ideas, values or beliefs different from theirs from entering the system or if they do slip in, their ideas generally are seen as too far “outside the box” and therefore discredited.
Thomas Kuhn, in his book on The Paradigm Shift, noted that compelling new theories go through three stages of integration before they reach a consensus. First, the theory is completely ignored as too idealistic or too far outside the box. Second, it is violently resisted and the messenger is attacked and discredited.
Third, a consensus in reached when it is accepted as if everybody knew this all along. Hopefully, this theory can reach consensus through other means. The power of the world-wide-web may be utilized to advance the process of the transformation of consciousness that can help build this consensus. It requires that we accept this theory as a reasonable alternative to the current worn-out approaches that seem only to create even more conflict.
We believe we are in the midst of a global paradigm shift. The first step in this shift of consciousness is to have governments and non-profits all over the world help create programs that educate the general public in their country become more aware of the true nature of their conflicts and those in they see in the world that they are facing. They need to be able to look beyond the obvious, easy pronouncements, like ‘war is inevitable.’ Our books and our blogs are designed to do assist this shift. If you are one of those people who would like to see a different world, you will have to do what Gandhi and others have suggested: Be the change that you desire.
We urge you to read our books and blogs and begin to better understand your own hidden and unhealed developmental shocks, traumas and stresses. We also urge you to take the courageous steps to heal any wounds you find related to these early experiences and change any mistaken beliefs you might have so that you can contribute positively to the collective shift of consciousness that is now occurring. The posts on our YouCanHealYourself site, that is part of our network, is a good place to start. Welcome! You're hired as part of our team that is committed to shifting consciousness.



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